What colour are your lover’s eyes, does their skin flush in passion? What is the feel of their skin under your fingers, lips or tongue. What sounds do they make in arousal or approaching orgasm? How do they taste, wht do they smell like as their passion rises?
Can you answer any or all of these questions? Tantric Lovemaking cultivates presence and awareness, not only in yourself and your responses, but in your lover and their responses. It is a simple, but beautifully effective technique, to blindfold your lover and awaken their senses individually to make them aware of, and enhance, their own senses but are you aware of your lover’s responses? Can you move in a flowing state with your lover, following the currents of their passion without words?
When you are tuned into their response, the opportunities for enhancing and deepening intimacy, lovemaking and passion become infinite. There is no great secret to this, no great challenge. It is down to being total when you make love, employing all your awareness in all of your senses. Relishing how different touches at different times can stimulate and arouse, how their sounds as they become more abandoned take on different notes and volumes, the musky smell of arousal and the changes in taste of your lover as arousal amplifies. Unlike the sensory awakening, this use of senses does not occur individually, but are all employed simultaneously and when you are present in your body, present in all your senses and are not looking for an outcome, the lovemaking flows. Your lover becomes an extension of you, not another person trying to reach a pleasurable climax with you. Their senses are your senses, there is congruence. By centering your breath, by focussing on the senses and feelings rather than on the techniques to obtain an outcome, the mind and the ego are excluded. Your body learns about theirs: the fingers remember the touch, the eyes remember the passion, the ears the cries of pleasure and the tongue the taste of their arousal. Next time you make love, be total in everything you do, from stroking to penetration, kissing to fingering: experience everything with every sense.