The Art of the Tantric Kiss
When I kiss you, I can taste your soul - Terri Guillemets
A kiss is more than just lips touching. Your soul surrenders in that moment and your heart expands into endless euphoria. Whether it is an affectionate kiss on the forehead, a soft kiss on the neck by your lover, a warm greeting or a passionate kiss in the midst of making love. A kiss full of presence, moist with love, can instantly lift us into a heavenly, mysterious, charming realm where our bodies seem to melt into each other, in love and devotion.
Kissing is truly a wonderful and sensual art, and it can become a language in itself. It is a profound sharing of energy, a drinking through the sensuality of the mouth, and through this the bodies connect in intimate circular fullness.
Our lips are crossed by countless nervous heads, hundreds more than at the fingertips for example. We might not think of our lips in this way, but they are the bodies most exposed erogenous zone. Packed with sensitive nerve endings, kissing involves five of our twelve cranial nerves, as we engage all of our senses to learn more about our partner. Electric impulses bounce between the brain, lips, tongue and skin which can lead to the feeling of being on a natural high due to the potent cocktail of chemical messengers that are involved (Dopamine, a powerful neurotransmitter which is involved in sensations of reward, making us feel intense desire, can lead to feelings of euphoria, insomnia and a loss of appetite, are only one of the factors in the great chemical symphony happening in our bodies).
In Tantra the engagement of every act is the objective; each act is in and of itself to be experienced, noted, savoured and remembered. In the Tantric tradition, kissing, also known as 'the contact of the superior gates', can raise or lower the energy flow; it can open blocked chakras and stimulate the nadis (subtle energy channels). Gazing into each other's eyes while exchanging passionate kisses harmonises the emotions and energies of the couple. A kiss can have a transformative impact on your cellular being, awakening your core essence and connecting you to the breath of the universe itself.
The energies of both sex and creativity are the focus of the second chakra, the Sacral, and this is the chakra in charge of 'flow'. It stimulates flow within our whole psychophysical energy system; not only the flow of bio-energy, but also our mental, emotional, psychic and spiritual energy. The flow of our manifestations, or what we create, is inherently tied to this regeneration chakra. Both sexual energy and creative energy are meant to take us into the unknown. Connecting consciously with your energy while cultivating the art of kissing expands your relationship with your inner lovers, aligning your Sacral in relation to your whole presence. You begin to move into a more richly embodied, trusting and powerful relationship with yourself, allowing access to your deeper self; allowing energy to flow.
The subtle body can also be stimulated and awakened by using open mouth contact on your partners body, placing kisses with conscious intent on the areas of the seven chakras
In kissing, as in lovemaking, we again do too much. Relaxation is the biggest aid to kissing. Relax your lips, allowing them to be soft and receptive, with your mouth slightly closed, bringing your full attention to your lips. Lips need to be relaxed and pliable, yielding and responsive to share the energy. Bring the lips together very slowly; let them join softly, like honey, melting into each other. Becoming present in them. Tantric kissing is done with full, sustained lip contact. This means not stopping or pulling away, but staying connected, allowing your lips to answer each other in this juicy, succulent dance. You remain joined at the lips, which are fused into a relaxed, sensual fashion. You get together and you stay together, so a tantric kiss can easily last for hours. Each person enter the lips with presence and awareness, becoming their lips. Be neither the giver nor the receiver - try to 'become' the kiss.
The tongue is usually not used in tantric kissing. When it is, it is only a little, and very delicately. Perhaps the tip of your tongue gently caresses the lips. The famous French tongue kiss can cause a sharp rise in the level of a man's excitement and encourage early ejaculation.
Like most things, kissing takes practise, so do not abandon the tantric kiss if you don't 'get it ' at first. It will click and soon you will feel the thrill and sensuality of the succulent lips themselves. There is nothing obvious to be seen from the outside - a kiss is a kiss - but from within, the experience can be electrifying.
Tantric tradition teaches that a woman's upper lip is connected to her palate and clitoris and this subtle nerve channel has a special sensitivity (it is known as the 'Wisdom Conch-like Nerve'). Sucking or gently nibbling the upper lip of a woman can be deeply erotic and sensual as it creates a circuit through which energy flows. For men there is channel between the lower lip and the eye of the penis. In the Taoists texts, the saliva of a sexually aroused woman is known as Jade Spring and is considered the most precious of the three secretions produced by a woman (the other two being from the breasts and yoni). Jade Spring is produced by ducts beneath a woman's tongue, and a Tantric technique is for the woman to place the tip of her tongue on the roof of her mouth as orgasm approaches, which is when the essence is produced. Then as she climaxes, she offers her tongue to her partner to suck and drink the sweet, vital essences in the saliva, which are reputed to have great healing and medicinal properties.
The Kama Sutra describes a number of different types of kisses. In however you choose to kiss your partner, penetrate your lips with your presence and awareness, and you will be amazed at the effects in your own body and in your partners response.
Karen O'Moore June 2014